When I was working at MTV News, I had the chance to interview actress Mila Kunis in person. It was at some radio studio in Manhattan, where she was talking to a bunch of morning shows by satellite about the return of “Family Guy.” This was back in 2005, when she was dating that loser Macauley Culkin.
When I arrived for the interview, I was startled by how gorgeous she was. She had on no make-up, was in a shitty little sweatshirt, chain-smoking butts, and I was amazed at how naturally beautiful she is. I wanted to strip her down, and lick up the sweat from every wanton pore on her body, but it was all for naught. This has nothing to do with Amenra signing with Neurot Recordings but I don’t care.
We spoke for a good 45 minutes about her career, “Family Guy,” he desire to work in film more, and I swear to you that if I didn’t know any better, she was into the Chris. I remember walking back to Times Square to the MTV News offices, thinking, “I could’ve banged that broad. She wanted. She was liquified.”
She probably wasn’t. I mean, Macauley Culkin is just so fucking handsome, how could she ever stray from the weirdo? I, too, was married at the time so, it wouldn’t have worked out. But now, I see she’s accepting date invitations online from soldiers, and I’m thinking, “Damn, if only she knew how well I would treat her.”
Let me just say this, Mila. With me, you’d have to do none of the work. You’d just have to sit back and enjoy the multiple orgasms I would give you with my mouth. That said, wanna come over and play “Hide The Sausage?” No? Prude!
So, Neurot Recordings has signed Belgian act Amenra. They’ll release the band’s newly completed fourth full-length album, Mass V, in the coming months.
Stated Amenra in a collective statement about signing with Neurot: “Since day one, and for a decade now, we found ourselves in a cold and lonely place. Until our paths crossed with the Neurot family. A warm embrace. We believe now we have found a place we can call our own, and with great pride. We sincerely see this as the opportunity for us to prove to the world that our being here on Earth, In time, will not go unnoticed, but will be well spent. Mass V. We will make it mean something, always and everywhere.”