When I was in college, I was jumped by a bunch of dudes. It was all over a chick. I was in a bar, working my mojo, while my friends were working theirs. I was talking to this chick, and things were going well. Next thing I know, some douche is telling me “I was talking to her first.” Words were exchanged, I threw my beer in the dude’s face, and as I was walking home, these six or seven dudes just attacked me.
Beer bottle across the back of the head. I remember getting in a few good swings. I awoke in the hospital with brain contusions. From them stomping on my head.
I know Daniel Lynch’s pain. The guitarist for the U.K.’s Evisorax was attacked by a pack of goons over the weekend and left with a “severely broken” leg. We reached out to Daniel for more information on what happened.
“I had been out in another local town with my friends for a night of drinking and fun,” Lynch recalls. “We had a great time and [it’s] safe to say I was very drunk. We got back to our hometown and I made my way home walking on foot.”
Dan was halfway home, and his recollection of the events is obviously slightly fuzzy. But he can remember being hit very hard.
“I remember getting blurred faces that were hitting me and I remember being thrown on the floor,” he tells me. “The one thing that sticks in my memory above everything else is the extreme pain and not being able to move; each time I attempted to move my body it was like I was being dragged down. It was the excruciating pain in my leg. Though I didn’t know at this point how badly I was injured. Combine this with the amount of alcohol I had consumed and you can imagine how disorientating and confusing this was.
“The next memory I have is a voice, very aggressively telling me to ‘Get up, get up you fucking pussy. Come on.’ At this point the pain had become so intense I was blind, not in a sense that I couldn’t focus but that I actually couldn’t see a thing. It was black.”
“I pleaded with whoever the voices belonged to, to just leave me alone and that they were cowards to hit a man that couldn’t even get up to face them. I distinctly remember hearing either ‘Stab him or stamp on him,’ at this point I thought that this was it — I was going to die.
“I recall trying to delay them, though still unable to focus even though my vision had returned. My body must have overloaded itself with adrenaline because my last memory was thinking that I was not going to be finished off on the floor.
“That’s my last memory of the attack at this point. The next thing, I’m being cradled by a female screaming and there’s others surrounding me. I was bemused and unsure what the problem was; they informed me that they had called an ambulance and I was not to move.
“As I moved moved my neck around, I realized I was laying in the middle of a road — later realizing that whoever had attacked me must have dumped my unconscious body there in hopes a car would hit me to make it appear that the whole thing was just down to me being drunk and being hit by a car.”
That’s fucked up, dude. I feel so bad for this dude.
“It took some time for the paramedics to move me into the ambulance, understandable as I’m 6 foot 7. I remember the paramedic looking very concerned at my leg, but again I didn’t at this point understand as to why. In my mind I was fine and was happy to walk home and not cause any fuss.
“The paramedic gave me the gas tube and strongly advised me to start sucking on it if I wanted to get through this. Upon arriving at A&E there were many faces I remember being concerned and people commenting on my leg. I was taken to the x-ray room and on returning, I asked someone if they think it’s bad. To which they responded ‘You do realize your legs severely broken, don’t you?’
“My memory suddenly started to trigger and the level of pain significantly increased, as I frantically searched my clothing for my belongings and discovered my phone was missing; everything started falling back into my mind.
“Being informed that the most probable cause of my leg and the indications the doctors received from my injuries and scans was that my leg had been laid across a curb and jumped on in order to cause such pressure resulting in both my tibula and fibula both being snapped.”
Holy fuck, this is not cool at all. People are savages.
“Over the next few hours as the details unravelled and the doctors saying that I was lucky to have survived such a sickening and violent attack, my mind began to process everything. I felt sick. I’m currently still in the hospital, on a significant amount of strong pain killers. The only upside of these is the fact I’ve been able to experience some pretty interesting trips!”
At least Dan is keeping his spirits up. But he will be having surgery soon, and it will be a major procedure.
“I’m waiting to go into surgery; I’m having a metal rod being inserted through my knee cap and will run down to my ankle,” Daniel tells us. “My bones will then be pinned together and attached to plates which are attached to the rod. The surgeon and consultants have told me that if I’m very lucky, I might be able to start walking again in May, but this is if I’m LUCKY!”
Daniel says that despite the attack, his band will be working on new music.
“Evisorax are due to record the next album in February 2013…this will STILL happen,” he writes us. “We are booked to play dates with Mumakill and Afgrund in March…this will STILL happen. Our debut U.S. tour is being booked and will commence in July…this will STILL happen.
“I will not be defeated, postponed or changed by these low-lifes,” he writes. “The only way they will win or come out on top or defeat me is if I allow them.”
Go check out Evisorax and wish Daniel a speedy recovery. And to the dudes who attacked him, apparently for no fucking reason at all: Please go fucking choke on your dead dogs’ cocks, you worthless bags of meat. That’s all you are is brainless walking meat.