The next generation of YouTube videos has been guaranteed. iRobot, the firm behind the cute must-have Roomba, last week unveiled a new robot designed to do nothing but record hilarious videos, cause divorces, and get people fired.

They claim the ConnectR is to allow virtual visits: it’s a remotely controllable camera and speaker that allows grandma or the faraway spouse to move around the house and interact with people just like they were there (assuming they stared at everyone’s feet and couldn’t climb stairs when they lived at home).

But look at the facts: it can move and hide, it stays on when you’ve turned your computer off (it connects directly to your router), and the only thing between you and an unexpected shower scene flashed around the world is your family’s ability to generate secure passwords. This thing couldn’t be more designed to spy on you if it came from Q Branch.

It’s scheduled for release in 2008, but trials will be going ahead later this year (you can apply here if you feel like playing Russian roulette with your privacy), and we predict it won’t get through the pilot program before it causes somebody to be:

1. caught in an affair
2. an impromptu porn star
3. arrested
4. divorced
5. all of the above, in that order

Worse, any embarrassing snaps won’t be going to MI6 but to Digg, YouTube, and all those others sites you enjoy visiting but don’t want to appear on. People have already managed to do all these things with webcams, and those are permanently pointed at your face in clear sight.

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Entry was posted on Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007 at 12:19 am under Uncategorized.

Read more entries by Luke McKinney.
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