On Thursday, December 17th, Baltimore‘s resident auteur and enfant terrible, John Waters, will be headed to the metro area to present his one-man show extolling his obsession with all things Christmas. But beware: this ain’t exactly the Andy Williams Holiday Spectacular and barf bags are most definitely not included.

Here’s how Alexandria‘s Birchmere, the typically classy dinner theater hosting the event, sums up DC‘s only yuletide celebration that promises to bring the raunch wholesale:

Like a wayward Santa for the Christmas obsessed, legendary filmmaker and raconteur John Waters (Pink Flamingos, Hairspray, A Dirty Shame) rides into town on his sleigh full of smut this December spreading yuletide cheer with his critically acclaimed one-man show, “A John Waters Christmas.” Putting the X in Xmas, Waters’ rapid-fire monologue explores and explodes traditional archetypes as he shares his compulsive desire to give and receive perverted gifts, a religious fanaticism for Santa Claus, and an unhealthy love of true crime holiday horror stories. Delving into his passion for lunatic exploitation Christmas movies and the unhealthy urge to remake all his own films into seasonal children’s classics, The Pope of Trash will give you a Joyeux Noel like no other.

Tickets for “A John Waters Christmas” are now on sale. For more information, visit www.birchmere.com or Waters’ homepage, www.dreamlandnews.com, and check out more perverse holiday gatherings on the CultureMob blog or follow us on Twitter.

Culture "A John Waters Christmas" at the Birchmere…Need We Say More?