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Review: ‘The Ring of the Nibelung’ At Seattle Opera


I just have one word to describe this show: inconsiderate. I don’t know who was in charge of the lighting, but it was way too bright, and likewise the music was far too loud. I don’t know how they expected anyone to sleep with all that hubbub happening on stage. Seriously, when I get invited to review opera, I expect to get at least two hours shuteye out of the deal.

But no! Instead, I was forced to stay awake for the ENTIRE SHOW. Every time I started to doze off, something interesting would happen and my quest for slumberland was ruined. In the past, I’ve always been kind to Seattle Opera. Even when they threw me out while I was trying to have a shower in the men’s room, or that time I was told that no, my three course thanksgiving dinner was not an appropriate snack to bring into the theater. But this show was the last straw. It’s as if everyone involved with Seattle Opera is dead set against people performing domestic activities in their venue.

So no more Mr. Nice Guy (I’ve seen to it he’ll never write for Culturemob again). You know what else was wrong with this show? The costumes. They had actors prancing around on stage in outfits that looked like they came straight out of Norse mythology. Reality check: no one dresses like that anymore. That sort of look is so prehistory. Really I’m not sure what they were going for.

What’s more, this entire show is based on false advertising. I mean The Ring? Seriously? Did no one who wrote this script know that the Japanese already made a film with that title. Never once during the show did I hear a mention of “Seven Days,” so they clearly don’t have the respect for even a simple homage to the source material.

Also, the plot is completely unbelievable. Norse gods, seriously? Factual error guys, none of that ever actually happened. It should be a crime to mislead people like that. I don’t even understand this whole Asgard place. Plus, the whole “magic ring” story has already been done by someone you might have heard of. I’m talking about Peter Jackson of course. It’s clear that Seattle Opera is just trying to cash in on the success of Mr. Jackson’s completely original movies.

Anyway, don’t go see this show. It’s no good. Did you know they don’t even let you throw rotten vegetables any more? The ushers tossed me out when I tried. So now I have a bag of decomposing tomatoes and no way to get rid of them. Thanks Seattle Opera, thanks for that.

Happy April 1st everyone!