Steven Adler
Thank God for Google Alerts, because I hardly ever read The Canadian Jewish News; it’s always been too pro-Zionist for me. Without that email alert, I would have missed this interview with Steven Adler, formerly of Guns N’ Roses, and I’m afraid he may be back on the funny junk.

He must be smoking something because he believes a reunion tour of the original Guns N’ Roses lineup could earn “billions.” Yes, “billions.”

“There are two reasons why I want to do a tour with the original Guns N’ Roses guys,” Adler said, adding that one is straight up cold hard cash. “There’s all the love I receive around the world. I have heard ‘Appetite For Destruction is the soundtrack to my life’ in so many languages. I’ve heard it thousands of times and that is the greatest thing anyone can say to me. We owe it to those fans. And two, the money we could make! The whole thing could make billions of dollars. All we have to do is get on stage with each other for 90 minutes.”

Billions? Maybe if they toured for fucking five years straight, but Axl Rose can’t even show up for the tours he has with dudes who worship him. How the hell would a tour last for more than two shows?

If an original GN’R reunion does happen, and you really, really want to see it, fly to wherever the first date is and see that show, because that’ll probably be the only one that actually happens.

Adler also talked drugs.

“I tried killing myself. It is not easy! A human body can put up with a lot. I had a stroke, a mild heart attack and I was in a coma for four days — all at once. My doctor said I’d be brain dead or lose the left side of my body. I was blessed because I can still play drums and I didn’t lose my brain.”

Entertainment Steven Adler Still Holding Onto GN’R Reunion Dream