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Marilyn Manson Names New Album, Was Astonished By Shia

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Captain Manson
Marilyn Manson hasn’t mattered since the 1990s, but that’s not stopping the shock rocker from releasing more subpar music.

In a new post on his Web site, Manson revealed that his forthcoming album will be called Born Villain. Yesterday, Manson released a video for a song by the same name, but it had fat old broads in it with forests of pubery between their dimply thighs, so I spared you.

“While looking to experiment in unlikely collaborations, I met Shia [LaBeouf], and we spent a long night at my studio,” writes Manson on his site. Shia’s supposedly shooting a documentary on the making of Born Villian.

“After seeing ‘Maniac,’ his short film, which is somewhat inspired by ‘Man Bites Dog,’ I was astonished by his directing ability,” Manson goes on. “So I shared quite a few of my favorite inspirations in art, literature, and obviously…film. I was impressed with how Shia digested my world, and made what I’d like to think, is both an homage and a mockery of the history of Cinema. We ended up writing a short film, and just recently released a trailer. The score is from my new album, and is, in the words of Macbeth, ‘full of sound and fury.’

“I find the idea of a yawning MGM lion far more interesting than a roaring one. You ask why we did this? ‘No reason.’”

Astonished. Astonished!!! Does Shia LeBarf seem like someone who could ever — on a personal level, anyways — be described as “astonishing?” To me, he comes across like a dope with no personality.