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Iron Maiden Songs Turned Into Lullabies

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Ridiculous
That’s just what we need. I’m serious.

It’s time to get kids started on the classics early. I have a nephew on the way, and I feel like he’ll need to familiarize himself with “Run To The Hills” before he enters pre-school.

As The Gauntlet so eloquently put it, “Twinkle Twinkle Little Rock Star has taken another great band and made their songs accessible to babies.”

This time, a 12-track set featuring Iron Maiden’s best tunes is coming to stores near you.

You can hear samples of this horrific transformation right here. I say just let your kids listen to Iron Maiden records, really. I mean, compared to some of the shit they could be exposed to early on — say, Aborted — Iron Maiden is kind of tame.

Really, at this point, it’s hot adult contemporary.

The songs that will appear on the Twinkle Twinkle Little Rock Star tribute to Iron Maiden include “The Number of the Beast,” “The Trooper,” “Aces High,” “Can I Play With Madness,” “Flight of Icarus,” and “Where Eagles Dare.”