Technology with attitude

Black Label Society’s Zakk Wylde To Get Roasted

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Zakk Wylde
Leave it to the talentless, unoriginal fucks at Guitar World to steal another idea, and pawn it off as original — an idea that’s already working for another brand.

Comedy Central has been getting huge ratings over the years with their celebrity roasts of dudes like Charlie Sheen and Hugh Hefner. Now, Guitar World — the princes of thieves — will be co-opting that formula for the metal work.

“Guitar World is proud to announce the magazine’s first-ever Rock & Roll Roast with inaugural honoree Zakk Wylde,” reads a press release. There about 100 different sponsors of the event, including Dunlop. They sell sporting equipment, no?

The roastmaster will be Sharon Osbourne. Other metal-loving luminaries such as Ozzy Osbourne, Chris Jericho, Anthrax’s Scott Ian, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Slipknot’s Corey Taylor, as well as comedy and roast veterans Jim Norton, Brian Posehn, Jim Florentine and more will all take aim at the Black Label Society frontman and guitar icon.

I wonder how many people will make fun of Zakk for only threatening to break legs, and never actually following through on such threats. And his gay stalker. And that infamous picture of him in tights at the hospital. And his appreciation for Lady Gaga.

“How can they roast me? I’m a good Catholic boy…,” asks Wylde.

Roastmaster Sharon explained, “Zakk has always called me his Mom, but I think my boy needs a good kicking.”
 
The show will kick off on the opening night of the 2012 NAMM Show in Anaheim, California.