I have always wanted to visit Minnesota. The first girl I ever kissed was from there, and so I have had this strange yearning to see what that part of the world is like.

Then I remember I don’t dig the cold, and that hankering subsides.

Anyways, as I write this, the douche who lives downstairs is blasting his hip-hop shit, so I will be turning on Tool, and blowing my speakers out very soon.

Speaking of Tool, frontman Maynard James Keenan will be pulling double duty at the River’s Edge Music Festival in St. Paul on June 23 and 24.

Not only is Tool one of the headliners, his band Puscifer is playing too.

So are Coheed and Cambria, Brand New, the Scissor Sisters, Dave Matthews Band, the Flaming Lips, and MuteMath, among others.

Get your tickets today! Or don’t. No fucks given on this end.

Home Entertainment Tool Booked For River’s Edge Music Festival