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Axl Rose Is A Dirty Old Man; Probably Boning Lana Del Rey

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Lana Del Rey
So, this is weird — but not at all unexpected. I mean, Axl Rose is like you and I, so long as “you” have XY chromosomes: meat and bone covered with flesh…a man with an insatiable wang that wants to explore the inner workings of girls half his age.

The other night, TMZ caught the Guns N’ Roses frontman — who is 50 — leaving one of his favorite West Hollywood haunts — the Chateau Marmont — with 25-year-old singer-songwriter Lana Del Rey.

Lana’s perhaps best known for being an overnight sensation, and the first unsigned artist to get booked on “Saturday Night Live.” Her lyrics seem like they were written by a 14-year-old.

Axl is likely boning her, right? I mean, why would he be hanging with her? She would be perfect for Axl. In fact, she kind of resembles Stephanie Seymour. A little.

Axl — who will soon be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame with the rest of Guns — was asked as he left whether there will ever be a reunion tour with the “full lineup.”

Axl replied: “Not in this lifetime.”

Next weekend is the Rock Hall induction. Keep your browser locked on GSA for our commentary as the fucking drama unfolds. And there will be drama.