It’s a slow fucking news day.

Somewhere, a bunch of kids are asking Jesus and God why the fuck their precious Cornerstone Festival’s been axed.

Think about that for a second. If you smile, you are evil. Like me.

This year’s installment of the long-running Christian lovefest will be its last.

Typically held in Bushnell, Illinois, the Cornerstone Festival usually features a bunch of faith metal.

The festival’s organizers have issued a statement regarding their decision to end the yearly gathering.

In brief, the market is dead, and the economy blows.

But maybe if you all pray real hard, everything will be reversed, and the global economy will thrive, thus allowing the festival to rise again.

Home Entertainment Satan Wins! 2012’s Will Be Last Cornerstore Festival