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Razormaze: Exclusive Tour Diary, Part 1 — Wafflehouse Of God

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The band and their beer
Razormaze are currently on the road, and lucky for us, the band’s been kind enough to extend an offer to the site. That offer? They asked that we run their tour blog — an opportunity we jumped at. Today, we bring you the first installment, written by the band’s Alex Citrone.

Hi there. We’re Razormaze, a Boston, Massachusetts-based world famous thrash band. I’m Alex Citrone, the singer and rhythm guitarist. Written here are tales from our current beer-soaked journey across the Eastern United States.

We’ve been booking our own tours for centuries now (five years) and they keep getting better and better. This one is very special because it marks the release of our new album Annihilatia.

It also marks Narragansett beer sending us off with five cases of their delicious brews. Needless to say, shit’s been getting saucy and weird.

A wee Sam

CHAPTER 1: WAFFLEHOUSE OF GOD

Day 1: Philly, Pennsylvania — After some mind-fucking traffic through New York, we finally made it to the venue, Kung Fu Necktie. Also on the bill was our old buds Howl and new buds Lord Dying. We slayed, imbibed many terrible liquids and made an overnight drive to our bassist Sam’s grandmothers house in order to be in Columbia, South Carolina, at a decent hour the next day.

We partied super hard with her. We were still late. Fuck it.

In Columbia

Day 2: Columbia, South Carolina — So, now we’re all horribly delirious from nearly 20 hours of driving in two days. Why the fuck did we route things this way? I BLAME SAM. We need to go on stage pretty much as soon as we arrive. Luckily, it’s to a huge-ass crowd. THIS TOWN RULES — PLAY THERE.

Divulgence and Deathstill held it down opening things up for us. Both good buds and great bands.

Yup

After the show we locked ourselves in dog cages and drank more fine NARRAGANSETT ALES until losing consciousness. We stayed the night in an animal shelter.

One of the dogs pissed on me while I was sleeping. WORTH IT.

Day 3: HOTLANTA — Gods be praised, the drive today was only three hours. We played a great set with our buds in Death of Kings and then went to their house, listened to hair metal and acted like assholes. Same shit, different toilet. I did a really nice tattoo on my friend Haley’s leg and Mel from Royal Thunder made fun of my vagina.

That looks delicious

Day 4: Birmingham, Alabama — Another quick drive today. Played an amazing DIY spot called Firehouse. Had a great stage and sound system and a keg was provided for all attendees.

The show boasted a pretty diverse line up: a rippin raw thrash band called Scum Lord, a hardcore act called The Black Hole kids and an instrumental act called In Snow, LITERALLY EVERY KIND OF MUSIC.

A fantastic turnout on a Monday night. Afterwards we ate bakers at Als; gigantic steaming hot piles of shit on baked potatoes the size of a human skull. We then enjoyed some A/C at our pal Griffin’s house and reddited until our eyes melted. WORTH IT.

NEXT CHAPTER: DINGUS DOES DALLAS