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Job For A Cowboy Drummer Needs New Job

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Jon Rice
‘Cause he fucking quit, bitches.

Well, Job For A Cowboy drummer Jon Rice’s parting with the band is said to be amicable, according to Lambchode.com.

“As of this past August, I have decided to part ways with Job for a Cowboy,” Rice said in a statement. “There are a few reasons for this, none of which I’m going to get into.”

Gee, why even fucking release a statement, asshead?

“That being said, I have no intentions of stopping touring or playing. I honestly love to tour and play live with new people, so I look forward to playing in new musical arenas in the future.”

Kind of hard to do on your own, bro.

“The dudes and I are on very good terms with this and they understand the decision. They have a new record in the making and I’m extremely excited to hear it.”

I bet you are. Mike Portnoy loved the last two Dream Theater albums.

The band has yet to comment.