As you all probably know, the Lostprophets guy pled guilty to an atrocious number of sexual crimes, which is to say he admitted guilt to more than 0 — the appropriate number of sex crimes a person should commit during their lifetime. As a result, the internet exploded with irreverent humor, as it is wont to do.
People forget, though, there has literally been nothing that some dude on the internet hasn’t made a joke out of.
For those who are as confused by double negatives as I am, here’s a translation of that last sentence: because the internet has given every person with at least a Gateway and a dial-up connection an actual voice to be heard, everything that can be joked about will be joked about. And probably will be in the most offensive manner possible.
I am not writing to defend this phenomenon, although this would be a pretty good opportunity for a First Amendment diatribe on whether it’s okay to make a gross joke just because it’s constitutionally protected. I’m writing to tell Infant Annihilator and its fans to quit whining about that image of the Lostprophets guy with the IA logo next to him. It was posted a few days ago, and the overwhelming outcry of being offended by this fake album cover was hilariously palatable.
Did you read that correctly: a band called INFANT ANNIHILATOR AND ITS FANS GOT OFFENDED BY BEING ASSOCIATED WITH INFANT ANNIHILATION.
Do you see the logical disconnect? This band is somehow so embarrassed about the subject matter it proliferates that they are making massive contributions to NSPCC. Is it too hot in the kitchen? Sorry, you gotta stay in there, IA and fans. You took on head chef duty whenever you called your band INFANT ANNIHILATOR and wrote about murdering, raping, and doing other unspeakable acts to children and pregnant women.
Along with the “sexy” gimmick, intellectually baseless gore-worship is another schtick I loathe, so I’ll admit I’m biased against Infant Annihilator.
Taking that into consideration, though, I’m still not saying you shouldn’t write songs about those topics or name your band something patently offensive. After all, Dying Fetus is one of the best bands in metal history. But don’t act surprised and innocent whenever something like this happens. When you named yourselves Infant Annihilator, you opened the door and invited this type of association. You can’t tell people not to spread that image because that’s unfair. You’re saying, “Hey, WE are the only ones who can produce offensive material. If you do it, it hurts our feelings.”
And the material they produce is pretty offensive. It’s tolerable for a seasoned metalhead, but honestly, take a look at their lyrics from a rational standpoint. Are songs describing priests raping pregnant women and killing every child in the world offensive to at least some people? I’d wager, yeah. To most people it would be. Specifically Catholics, priests, and anyone who has an aversion to violence. But the offended put up with it because artistic expression, no matter how graphic, should be protected.
Don’t kid yourselves, Infant Annihilator, you’re a shitty, tasteless deathcore band. Your artistic contribution is barely there, but it’s enough to say you have a right to it.
So IA and IA fans, quit polluting the internet with comments about how they didn’t mean to be associated with sex crimes or crimes against children. It’s obviously not true, or they would have chosen a better name.